<body>
underneath the stars
I'll wait for you.

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Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Foolish fool
4:17 AM

" Ee babo....means "this fool" in korean hangul...
This fool is me....for falling for a foolish boy..

How many times have i made a fool of myself??
If those times are money, i'll be Donald Trump.

How many times have i foolishly make a confession??
Twice, literally speaking.

How many times have i been thinking about the foolish boys in my life??
Loads, tons, always.

How many times have someone tell me that i look cute when i act foolishly??
One. For real.

How many times have i told someone that he is a foolish boy??
Once in a lifetime, however this might change in the future coz i would love to call my boyfriend foolish when im upset or angry or when i feel like it.

How many times have i done foolish things like frequently check his profile on friendster/facebook/myspace???
Every chance i can get.

How many times have i told myself to stop acting foolish??
More than u can ever thought of.

How many times have i told myself not to be a fool in love??
Just enough for me to stay strong in my belief which is to stay single till i'm ready.

Foolish love, loving fool, love the foolish fool........"


Thursday, January 22, 2009
Its been so long....
11:06 PM

" yeah i know...its been long since i blog...nothing much to say at that point of time...

Recent events got me thinking......

Was that the best way to deal a situation...Running away and letting go something precious to you...?

I know i've been cold to some these past few days...i had to...rather than bursting out in rage....

I wont apologise because literally i did nothing wrong, so do you...

My actions have dire consequences on someone else, now that i realized...

She needs him and i am not helping...

Hello? wonder mala? where art thou? the girl who help people tide things over? where have you been???

I must not be selfish..in order to pursue what i had planned, i forget the inportant things....

And i know YOU dont need me, coz i dont need you too..

How can someone be so religious yet perceived as mean by someone?

So who is the evil one here huh?

Oh ya...i miss you...and she need you..

always time like this when i think of you and wonder if you ever think of me

Everything so wrong and i dont belong living in your precious memories.

So sad, it's a sad situation but not sad enough to drive me to tears...

Cant blame me here...i can cry at dramas where it doesnt concern me...i know...im very SENSITIVE and emotional,and touchy...and....and...

She asked: What have you ever said or done to make him hate YOU?????

I said: I dont know....

Haiz...sometimes in life u wont get answers for everything...

In life, there are always choices and its up to you to make the right choice...


I am making one starting from now......"

PS: I miss it.


Thursday, January 15, 2009
Silence
4:44 AM

" I will learn to give up...

Because i am scared that i will fall in love with you...

Silence is the best that i can do...

Dont worry, i will still be fine...."


Friday, January 9, 2009
It's over....
12:58 AM

" I've never felt lonely like this before...It's a different kind of loneliness...When there is a friend that is available, i push that away...instead..i keep on running after those who dont need me...maybe dont want me....so lonely.....

Thank god for music...without music life would be a mistake.....the only thing that cheers me up is none other than entertainment....i love entertainment...i was born to entertain...my talent lies in there...so what am i doing here?? What to do? I miss entertaining...i really do....

I must learn to be independent...i must...i have to...

It is seriously over...i dont think i even want to do it....the only one time we had fun is.... over...only once in a lifetime...No more.....

Dang! i feel like crying...what is happening to me?
why over this???????????

It is sad that my new year start like this.....I dont want to pretend..im sick of pretending,im sick of trying and im really tired......too tired...this time i am not letting go...im giving it up....

I am giving it up...."

PS: It's over


Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Crazy in love
1:58 AM

Im doing crazy things now.
Ohmu, i really am! haha..
What to do?

It went awkward and silent now and then....
(LOL to sohee and yoobin)

Internet is like.......the mastermind for all things.....

U got me looking so crazy right now....

I was searching for him again...haiz...i know that this will happen...shit...hate to be the one searching...

What's so hard in telling someone you like them...huh? what's the fucking problem?????

Oh ya...fear of rejection, not enough courage, too shy kind of thing rite?

That's Bollocks!!!

You dont need a reason to like someone

Geez... this liking business is hard, man.....i wish my heart is made of stone...but only for a while....

Whatever..i LOVE Shinee,Samb and the gang...and its not hard at all.....

PS: Going crazy....


Sunday, January 4, 2009
Random words
5:35 AM

Are there times where i feel insecured? Hell yeah!

Yah....Yah.....

Life is a bitch...oh boy...

Jeez....

HAHA

HEHE

Whatever!


When it's at night
4:48 AM

" I am so loving the current drama starring Kim sun ah- When it's at night.I really LOVE it!!! haha...

My dream guy is exactly like the character Kim Bum Sang played by Lee Dong Gun.Here is a list of my dream guy's aspect-
  1. He is CUTE.
  2. He is NAUGHTY & FOOLISH.
  3. He likes to exaggerate. (this is where cute comes in too)
  4. He dress stylishly.
  5. He is a playboy. (i believe that i can change that part of him...hehe)
  6. He is cunning.
  7. He lies when he is nervous.
  8. He likes to argue.
  9. He throws tantrum around.
  10. He always managed to put up a good image of himself to others. (but he fails to fool me)

So if u want to see a guy like this in action, go watch the drama! Hehe. I'm on cloud nine......=)

On a different note, I am liking someone. It is just a like. Maybe more to fondness. He is warm-hearted, adorable, funny and the list goes on. But in his heart, there is sadness in his past, and because of that, there is no place for me in his heart.

I am yearning for him. It's true. Dreamt of him last night about how i always missed the chance of seeing him. In my dream, day one- my fren told me that he will always come to the bus stop at this certain time and he will take a certain bus, So on day two, I went there at the designated time, but it was too late. He already got on the bus. You know sometime, the bus will come earlier than the allocated time, so thats what happened. But the sad thing is that it happen a few times, and it go me thinking that it is not meant to be.So what, if u have many special moments with that someone? U need two hands to clap. True. Those memories are priceless. BUT, it only meant something to only those who knew what they mean. There is no point brooding over it. Just keep on looking forward.It's as if the past is a whole other area, sealed off in my head, taped down at the edges. I can always come back to peel of the tapes, so i have decided to succumb to fate and keep it in my precious memories.

If can, I dont want to lose contact with u after graduation. But i think we will......."

PS: Who is the "you"?



Thursday, January 1, 2009
Ten out of ten
11:14 PM

" If i were a boy, i think i could understand...


It's going up not down, its getting better, its getting better, yeah!


Just like a small child happily receiving presents...
My present is YOU.


Only for the spur of that moment, i like you...
I just have to wait till that moment comes....

If you wanna man like a stronger....I've got you lady...
U've got me, definitely

But anything that goes up will come down...
i wanna treasure this moments then, before it goes down....

I still like the way you look at me...
I think u know what i mean....

Ten out of ten points i give u
U are perfect for me now, but how bout later
when i already find someone new?

I like YOU, i dunno why
I still like YOU, this i know why

i wanna rock with u, dance with u, do everything with u...."


Dream
12:17 AM

" I dreamt of kissing you, loving you."


PS: Wish you were there.


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Keane Somewhere only we know - KEANE